Great Friends and Retarded Relatives

It is so awesome to have some of the friends I do! It is cool how one of my people in Austin knows me well enough to talk some sense into me from his personal experience as well.

It goes back to being "disowned" earlier this month and that makes Turkey day not fun at all.

For the most part the day has been ok got to the gym , worked on XML , talked to some friends on the phone from out of town, installed some video softwares on the workstation at home, but there is still a fucked up funk to a holiday when you don't feel wanted by your family.

So my friend starts into telling me how he deals with his crazy mother (prolly why he and me understand each other well having grown up each with a shit to the wind loopy mother) and he tells me that he treats his mother like she is retarded. Anytime she gets manipulative or out of hand he just treats he as a retard even though she isn't actually that far gone just crazy and mean.

Its a brilliant idea in that I just cant allow my self to get sucked into that emotional game. It should work in that I have to just understand that my mother has no real clue on the meanness she deals my way. What I need to keep working on is that I cant count on her for anything at all in this world, and continually have to forgive her for the shit she tosses my way - and yet its my responsibility to take care of her as she gets older.

That seems like such a raw deal but I have to live with my choices and actions and the values that I carry are not to abandon friends when the shit gets deep so the only choice is to step up and do the same for family even though it cuts deep at times.

So its off to see whats up at moms place maybe make her day better - just need to keep growing and be aware its not always about me.